


Acceptance

by deviantjoy



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxious Zuko (Avatar), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt Zuko (Avatar), Hurt/Comfort, Injured Zuko (Avatar), No Plot/Plotless, POV Zuko (Avatar), Prisoner Zuko (Avatar), Sokka & Zuko (Avatar) Friendship, Stubborn Katara (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko Friendship, Zuko (Avatar) whump, Zuko has nightmares, basically just a bunch of one shots in this universe, i am going to torture this poor boy every chapter and nobody can stop me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:01:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29188224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deviantjoy/pseuds/deviantjoy
Summary: He took a deep breath, exhaling his doubts. Small steps first. He was accepted— well, maybe not accepted, but he was allowed into the group. That was something, at least. Maybe if he gave it time, things would get better. He could work his way up from prisoner to... ally, maybe. Acquaintance. That sounded doable enough.
Relationships: Aang & Zuko (Avatar), Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Sokka & Zuko (Avatar), Toph Beifong & Zuko
Comments: 14
Kudos: 188





	1. Outlier

**Author's Note:**

> this being my second ever notable chaptered fic and the first and only not-horrible one? it's more likely than you think
> 
> i watched atla a couple months ago and, as any good avatar fan, whump lover, and fanfic writer would, wondered, "hm. what would happen if they actually accepted his offer to be their prisoner." so here's the product of that lmao
> 
> so far this has a total of 4 completed chapters and tbh idk if i'll even ever get the 5th chapter done but as the tags say, this first chapter has zuko and toph interacting and he'll get to interact with the rest of the gaang soon enough! i'll be updating the tags as i update and he interacts with each of them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really like the idea that toph would warm up to zuko the fastest bc she can feel his physical reactions to things so he cant hide anything from her and she's the no-nonsense type so she'd actually Do Something about it so naturally i had her be the first to talk to him B)

“If you won’t accept me as a friend...”

Zuko dropped to his knees, head down in surrender as he offered up his wrists.

“...then maybe you’ll take me as a prisoner.”

It was humiliating, but if this was what it would take to prove himself... he’d do it.

“It’s... a tempting offer, I admit,” Sokka said, rubbing his chin in consideration.

“No!” Katara interrupted firmly, glaring at her brother. “No, we shouldn’t associate with him at all!”

“It’s not like we’d be friends with him or anything,” he scoffed, rolling his eyes. “He’d be our prisoner. That doesn’t sound too bad. We call the shots, Aang learns to firebend, then we... I don’t know, ditch him after the raid?”

“This is _Zuko_ we’re talking about,” she reminded him, spitting the name out like it alone could burn her. “We can’t trust him! What if he turns on us and kills us before we can kill the Firelord? What would we do then?”

“I-I wouldn’t, I swear,” Zuko said, daring to raise his head and look up at them. “I want to help. I really do.”

“See? He said it himself, the guy wants to help,” Sokka said with a confident smile.

“And you’re just going to trust him like that?” she scowled. “After all that he’s done to us?”

“Sokka’s right— for once,” Toph sighed. “All we need him for is to teach Aang firebending. Other than that, he’s not really our problem. We can just get Aang’s training over with and then ditch him.” She turned to where Zuko knelt. “He was telling the truth when he said he wouldn’t turn on us. And besides, if he tried anything, he’d have to get through me.” A stomp sent a rumble through the ground, aimed at Zuko, and he almost lost his balance as his heart rate spiked in slight fear.

He was really trying, making himself so vulnerable to them. Toph alone could kill him in half a second if she wanted to, especially with just about the entire place being made out of rock, and he couldn’t deny he was afraid of being vulnerable to all four of them. He could fight if he needed to, but he knew that wasn’t an option. He had to gain their trust. Even if it wasn’t truly trust— even if they would ditch him the moment Aang learned to firebend— he had to try. He knew now that that was his destiny.

“Aang?” Katara turned to him, arms crossed with a stern expression on her face, clearly expecting him to agree with her. Zuko looked on in anticipation, afraid to be hopeful and yet still eager to hear his decision.

Aang didn’t respond immediately. He turned solemnly to his friends, then to Zuko, who shrank just a little bit more under his gaze. He couldn’t believe his fate was in the hands of a twelve-year-old. It was almost laughable, but he had to stay humble. Stay calm. Be _good_ for once.

“We should let him stay,” Aang finally said, though there was a sadness to his tone. “I’m sorry, Katara. But we have to. I need someone to teach me firebending and Zuko’s the only chance I’ll get.”

“Okay, fine! I get it. You all trust the guy who’s been hunting us down for months more than me,” she huffed, her hands balled into angry fists as she stormed off. “I can’t believe you guys!”

“We don’t trust him, it’s just that—” But she was gone before Aang could finish his sentence.

Sokka put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry. She’ll get over it.”

Zuko watched her go, guilt weighing heavy on him. All he’d wanted was to redeem himself and he was already tearing the group apart. He could only hope he could fix things later on. At least the rest of them seemed favorable of him.

“Okay, so... what are we going to do about him?” Sokka asked, looking at Zuko.

“Not letting him walk free, that’s for sure,” Toph said. “I can make a cell for him if we need one.”

“Um, you can cuff me?” Zuko suggested, an unsure lilt to his voice as he held his wrists out after having absentmindedly lowered them. Once cuffs were on him, fighting was no longer an option, he knew. He didn’t see any better options, though. By giving himself up as a prisoner, he had already accepted the mistreatment that came with it.

“Works for me.” At a nod of approval from Aang, Toph ripped some rock from the ground near Zuko and bent it around his wrists, encasing them tightly.

“Cover his hands, too, so he can’t firebend,” Sokka said, and the rock cuffing his wrists wrapped around his hands.

There went his firebending.

He was totally vulnerable.

“You know, I think I’ll take you up on your offer to put him in a cell while you’re at it,” Sokka said, his arms crossed with an amused smile on his face.

Zuko sighed as thick poles of rock emerged from the ground, forming cell bars around him, and merged inward to make a ceiling. There went his freedom, too. He knew he couldn’t complain, this was the least of what they could do to him, but it still annoyed him. Especially Sokka’s stupid smug smile, mocking him from just beyond his prison.

“Maybe stick a rock in his mouth too—”

“Stop it! Now you’re just rubbing it in my face!” he yelled, cutting off their laughter and getting to his feet as annoyance and anger took over for just a moment. They were humiliating him on purpose. Treating him like an _animal_ . He should break out of his handcuffs, fight back, do _something_ to prove that he wasn’t so weak he’d allow him to treat him like this.

But he had to keep it together.

“I’m sorry.” He reminded himself he was lucky, at least he wasn’t in a Fire Nation prison. They’d do far worse to him there. “I’m surrendering myself willingly, okay? The least you can let me keep is my dignity.”

Sokka rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, okay, fine. As long as your _dignity_ doesn’t get in the way.”

“Thank you.” With some difficulty from his bound hands, he sat back down cross-legged, resigned to his fate. He never thought he’d be thanking anyone for letting him keep his dignity, of all things, and he definitely never thought he’d be thanking _Sokka_ for it, but annoyance could come later. Right now, he needed patience and humility.

He needed Uncle.

The thought was sudden, almost startlingly so, but that didn’t make it any less true. He needed Uncle Iroh’s guidance, now more than ever. Was he doing this right? Was he really good now? How was he going to keep it together through this and make it? How was he ever going to earn their trust?

He took a deep breath, exhaling his doubts. Small steps first. He was accepted— well, maybe not accepted, but he was allowed into the group. That was something, at least. Maybe if he gave it time, things would get better. He could work his way up from prisoner to... ally, maybe. Acquaintance. That sounded doable enough.

That night, with Katara back— albeit still seething— everyone gathered around a campfire Sokka somehow managed to light and talked as they ate.

At least, everyone but Zuko.

His cell had been relocated against the wall at Katara’s request, far enough from the campfire to be out of earshot of their conversation. Without his firebending, he was shivering in the cold, and without any food, he was also starving. He’d have asked for something to eat, but he guessed they wouldn’t be wasting any resources on him. Besides, it wasn’t that he was so far away that they’d forgotten to feed him— they’d given him plenty of side-eyes and suspicious glances— it just seemed that they didn’t care.

He’d already tried to focus on his body heat and intensify it with his mind instead of his hands, but it wasn’t working and the rocky ground refusing to trap his body heat wasn’t helping either. He was stuck in the cold. The most he could do to stay warm was curl in on himself, hug his knees to his chest and do his best with his covered hands to drape his robe over himself so it’d conserve heat better. The hunger was a different question, one he didn’t have the ability to find a solution to on his own. He could only try to substitute what little heat he had for food.

Be grateful. He had to be grateful— Uncle would want that. Keep a clear head. Remember things would be so much worse if he were in a Fire Nation prison. He was lucky to have even survived this long. They had every right to kill him. They were showing him mercy by not torturing him instead.

“Hey.” Toph’s voice coming from nowhere startled him and he jumped, automatically fearing the worst before he got himself back under control. “Aang told me to bring this to you.” A gap at the bottom of the rock bars formed and she slid a bowl of food through it. “He said you probably won’t be any good if you’re hungry.”

“Thanks.” He went to take the plate, then remembered. “Um— is it okay if I get my hands free to eat?”

“Oh. Yeah.” The rock handcuffs cracked through the middle and fell to the ground as he rubbed his wrists gratefully. He gave her a small smile as he took the bowl, forgetting until afterward that she couldn’t see it. “Just don’t try anything stupid, or you’ll regret it.”

“I won’t,” he said, leaning back to the wall with the plate in hand. “I promise.”

“Good.”

He watched as she returned to the campfire, where Katara glared at him and Sokka watched him with a frown and Aang just stared down at the fire, as if he were already trying to bend it.

It wasn’t long before he finished eating and they put the fire out. As he was wrapping his arms around his knees to stay warm, he noticed Toph and Katara coming over to his cell and braced himself for something bad to happen.

“Toph, put his handcuffs back on,” Katara ordered. “And next time, ask us before you uncuff him.”

“Yeah, yeah, will do, Mom,” she scoffed. The handcuffs on the ground rose into the air and found their place back on his hands and wrists, locking them in place.

“Come here,” Katara said. Zuko went to obey, but then she pulled a strip of cloth out from behind her back.

A blindfold.

He could’ve sworn his heart stopped for just a moment and he could only hope he hid it well enough. He had no choice, but his vision wasn’t exactly something he wanted to give up. Not when it made him just that much more vulnerable.

“Well?” she said expectantly, crossing her arms with the blindfold in hand. Toph’s fingers moved just a little and he had to fight the urge to flinch when he expected to be crushed.

“Wait— do you really have to blindfold me?” he asked, half-ready to back into the wall. He needed to be as far away from her as humanly possible, or she might force it on him. She looked stern enough to and he didn’t want to test the theory.

“If I want everyone to get sleep, yes,” she responded flatly. “If we just left you alone like this, we’d need somebody to guard you all night and there’s no point in doing that if we can just blindfold you. So are you coming here or are we doing this the hard way?”

“You don’t need to blindfold me, I’m not going to do anything, I swear—”

“Don’t be such a baby,” Sokka piped up from nearby. “Do you want us to let you stay or not?”

His heart was beating faster now as he realized he wasn’t going to win this. He couldn’t fight it or they wouldn’t trust him. A blindfold would really suck, but it didn’t seem like he had much of a choice. “Look, I just— I’d rather be able to see, okay?”

“Of course you would, so it’ll be easier for you to break out and attack us while we’re asleep,” Katara scowled. “Toph.”

She seemed hesitant, but a doorway formed in the bars and let Katara through.

Zuko’s first instinct was to scramble backwards, but it wasn’t long before his back hit the wall and panic rushed through him when he realized he was trapped. Toph must’ve noticed him raising his hands to protect himself, too, because his cuffs now seemed to weigh a thousand pounds and he couldn’t get them off the ground, giving Katara her opportunity to tie the blindfold over his eyes and around the back of his head.

He forced himself not to move, make it easier for both of them, but he couldn’t force his heartbeat to slow down as a controlled panic flooded over him. He sat stone-still, afraid that he’d show too much fear or lose control of himself if he didn’t, until he felt her move away and heard his cell bars bending back into place.

He didn’t let himself break until Katara’s and Toph’s footsteps faded away and he heard the _whoosh_ of the fire being put out.

His heart was pumping at a mile a minute and it didn’t take him long to realize he was shaking too, from the cold and the fear. Breathe. He had to breathe. In, out, in, out— but then the memories came flooding back and he exhaled shakily before his air supply was cut off by his panic. Staring his father in the eye, begging not to be forced to fight him, only to feel the angry burn of fire whipping against his face moments afterward. Passing out from the pain and waking up to the news that he was banished until he could prove himself worthy again. The walk of shame as he left the Fire Nation, his head hung to avoid the scornful stares of the firebenders around him.

No. He had to concentrate on breathing. Tears were welling up in his eyes and his breathing was just as shaky as he was. He buried his face in his elbows and tried to focus on steadying his breathing, but it was getting harder by the second and the blindfold gave him nothing to see but his memories. He couldn’t tear his focus away from his failures. He failed to fight his father, he failed to capture the Avatar, he failed to show his uncle he was worth it— he was a _failure_.

A voice ripped him out of his thoughts and he jumped, unable to stop himself in time. “...Zuko?” Toph.

He was a failure and now he was going to pay the price for it.

“S-sorry, I’m sorry, I, uh— I didn’t mean to wake you up,” he managed to get out. He hadn’t realized how heavily he’d been crying; his voice was unsteady and his throat was tight— that explained why it had become harder to breathe. The shaking had only gotten worse and he tried to stop it by hugging his knees tighter, though it was to no avail. It didn’t help that she was probably angry at him for being so loud he woke her up. Maybe she’d take Sokka’s suggestion and put a rock in his mouth so he’d shut up. But he knew what was to come would likely be worse.

“You’re shaking,” she said. “Really hard.”

“Just... cold, that’s all,” he said with a shrug, keeping his voice as steady as he could. Then he realized. “Wait. You can see that?”

“No. I can feel it,” she answered. “The ground around you is shaking, and it’s not because of me.”

“Oh.” He cursed himself internally. If she could feel him shaking, she could probably feel his heart beating like crazy, too. He swallowed his fear, trying to will himself to calm down, though he knew it was futile.

“By the way, just so you know, lying to me isn’t exactly helping you.”

“Sorry.” Of course he was already messing up.

He heard her move to his left and he flinched away, listening to her stop and presumably sit down. “Calm down, Fireflake, I’m just sitting down.”

The nickname made him curious— was she calling him a flake?— but he brushed it aside. “Sorry, again.” He forced himself to try and relax, focus on her presence instead of his thoughts.

“Jeez, you say sorry a lot. I don’t remember _that_ being a Fire Nation thing.”

“Sorry— er, I mean, it’s not. I’m just… on edge,” he sighed, shrugging. ‘On edge’ was an understatement; he didn’t feel safe here whatsoever. “I don’t want to mess up with you guys.”

She hummed in understanding, then paused. “So. What’s on your mind?”

She was referring to his breakdown. Was it safer to tell the truth or lie? Lying would mean he ran the risk of losing some trust if he was found out. Telling the truth would mean she knew things about him that he didn’t want her to know.

Deflection would be the best of both worlds.

“I don’t like being blind.”

“Yeah, join the club,” she scoffed. “At least you’ll get your sight back in the morning. I’ll never be able to see.”

He just had to say something offensive, didn’t he? “Sorry.”

“For what?” she asked. He thought he could almost hear a smile in her voice. “I’m kidding, Fireflake. I don’t care. I can see with my feet just fine. You really don’t need to apologize so often.”

He didn’t know how to respond to that, so he didn’t.

“Do you really want the blindfold off that bad?”

The question was sudden and his answer was almost an immediate yes, but then he remembered what Katara said to her. “No— you can’t. Remember what Katara said. She wanted you to ask them before you took anything off. I don’t want to upset her.”

“Nah, don’t worry about her. She said to ask them before I _uncuff_ you. She didn’t say anything about the blindfold,” Toph reasoned.

“She said someone would have to guard me if I didn’t have a blindfold on.”

“So I’ll guard you, then.”

“But you need to get some sleep.”

“So do you. You’re the one who has to teach Aang firebending.”

“No.” He sighed. “I can’t get myself further on Katara’s bad side. She hates me. I don’t want to be kicked out or hurt.”

“Hurt?” she said in bewilderment. “She wouldn’t hurt you— okay, maybe she would, but she wouldn’t hurt me. I’ll take the blame. Don’t worry about it.”

He wanted to accept her offer, he really did, but... could he really? Would he really be allowed to have his blindfold off? What if it was a trick to test his obedience and the others were around the campfire, watching him with hateful expressions on their faces?

“Are you sure?” he asked. “I can just... deal with it for tonight. You need to sleep. It’s okay, really.”

“No, it’s not. You have no idea how hard your shaking was,” she scoffed. “Really, I couldn’t go to sleep if I wanted to if I left your blindfold on.”

He held his breath for a moment, contemplating what he should say, and then released it. “Okay.”

“Alright, get over here.” He heard her move closer to him and he followed suit, blindly shuffling backward toward the left side of his cell until his back hit the bars.

He jumped slightly when he felt her hands feeling their way up to the back of his head, but when the tear-stained blindfold fell away to reveal the surroundings it hid, he breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you.”

“Sure.”

He glanced over where the rest of them were and, to his relief, they were too asleep to be angry at him for failing the test. It still put him on edge, knowing that if any of them woke up, he’d face the consequences, but he’d have to eventually either way. He should at least get some sleep before then.

But first, he wanted to know something.

“Why are you being so nice to me?”

“Hm?” She turned to face Zuko from where she sat, although she couldn’t see him.

“I don’t get it. I’m your prisoner. You can do anything you want to me. You could... I don’t know, torture me for information on the Fire Nation or something if you wanted. Or just torture me for fun. It’s not like I’d be able to stop you with my hands covered.”

“Torture you?” She sounded... shocked? “Hey, I’m mean, but I’m not that mean.”

“Why not?” he asked. “You could do anything you wanted to me, but instead you’re helping me. I just don’t understand why.”

“Because I can feel it when you lie and when you’re being sincere, and I haven’t felt a single lie yet,” she said. “Well, except when you said you were just cold. So I know you aren’t just really good at lying.”

“I have been honest, I just... I’ve done so much bad and most of it has been to you guys and I— I don’t deserve to be treated so well.” He sighed. “I don’t want Katara to hate me, but she’s right to be mad. I don’t understand why nobody else is too.”

“I don’t know how they do things back where you’re from, but we’re not Fire Nation,” she said. “My friends are nice people. So’s Katara, once she warms up to you.” She smiled. “Don’t worry, I got off on the wrong foot with her too. She’s annoying sometimes but she’ll warm up to you eventually. Just don’t make things difficult.”

“I’ll try.” He laid down on the ground, curling up in a loose fetal position in an attempt to keep himself warm. “Thank you, again.”

“For what?”

“For helping me. And being nice.” Even when he didn’t deserve it. “I think I needed it.”

“Don’t thank me. It’s the least I can do,” she said. “Now get some sleep so I don’t piss off Katara for nothing.”

He chuckled. “Yeah. Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as much as i'd like to say the blindfold idea is my own, i must give credit where credit is due lmao. these glorious blindfold feels were inspired by [birdyhands](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25235464/chapters/61171612) and [cantget__gEESE](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26421964/chapters/64369309), so go check out their fics (linked) for even more zuko whump! also may have accidentally plagiarized a line from cantget__gEESE's fic before i caught it and fixed it (if you see this, sorry about that lmao). but anyway, thank you for reading <3 i'll be updating every sunday until i run out of motivation lmao


	2. Heart-to-Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter’s the shortest of the bunch, but i couldn’t _not_ include zuko and sokka’s bromance, so here it is! the development is a bit quick for my liking but i’ve been in a bit of a funk lately and haven’t really been up for editing and revising, so apologies for the less-than-adequate chapter lmao
> 
> however, thank you to all those who subscribed, bookmarked, and commented!! it makes me really happy to know people are looking forward to reading the rest of this :))

“Uncle?”

Zuko stared across the pathway over the fiery red abyss, where his uncle had his back turned to him.

“Uncle,” he repeated, louder this time, though he still received no response. He took a step forward onto the pathway but the ground shook, almost knocking him off-balance and into the abyss.

“Do not take another step, Zuko,” Uncle warned, though he couldn’t possibly have seen Zuko move. Why was he rejecting him? What did he do?

No, that was a stupid question. He knew what he’d done.

“Uncle, please!” he called across to him, growing more and more desperate as the distance between them seemed to grow yet remain stagnant at the same time. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to betray you, I didn’t want to, I was stupid and believed Azula could help me and I let my own stupid pride get in the way—“

“You should have listened to me,” he sighed, disappointed, but there was a trace of anger in his voice that sent shivers down his spine.

“Please, Uncle, I know and I’m so sorry, I’ll make it up to you, I swear!” He dropped to his knees, feeling the tears well up in his eyes. “Just give me another chance! I won’t mess up again, I’ll listen, I promise I will—“

“Goodbye, Zuko.”

The middle of the pathway crumbled and fell into eternity, dropping at the same time his heart did, and he jumped to his feet to the edge of what was left, but it was too late. There was no way to get to him.

“I told you not to take another step.” He sighed. “You never listen.”

The edges of his island began chipping themselves away, pebbles falling and cracks forming in the rock.

“No, wait!” He stumbled back to the center of his platform as it grew smaller and smaller. “Wait, Uncle, please— Uncle, I’m sorry! Please! Come back!”

But he no longer dignified Zuko with a response. Little by little, the last few bits of ground disappeared into the darkness beneath and soon, he was dropped into it too.

He jolted awake the moment Uncle disappeared from view and a new panic rushed through him when he realized he still couldn’t see before remembering why. Blindfold. Right. It’s just a blindfold.

He’d gotten used to the cold by now, but he’d never get used to the blindfold. He’d sworn over and over that he wouldn’t try anything without the blindfold on, but Katara was absolutely adamant that it stayed on for at least a week, just to be safe. He understood why, but that didn’t make the panic go away every time he opened his eyes.

This was the sixth night he had to keep it on. He hated waiting for the seventh, but he found a little comfort in knowing the next time he had to be blindfolded would be the last.

“Hey, uh— you okay?”

He flinched and sat up at the sound of Sokka’s voice, especially surprised at how close he sounded. He must’ve been right outside his cell. Fearing the worst, he backed away a little just to be safe, guessing how far away he was.

“You’re jumpy tonight,” Sokka pointed out, probably trying to joke, but Zuko just turned away. He didn’t have time to be mocked. Sokka paused, then sighed. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you, I just… I came to check on you and you were shaking and talking in your sleep.”

Oh, no.

“Who were you asking to come back?”

He considered lying and saying nobody— after all, Sokka couldn’t tell if he lied— but he decided against it. “My uncle.” He had to remind himself: no lying.

“Oh.” Zuko heard him take a step, though he wasn’t sure in which direction. “Iroh?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

He scoffed. “You know why. You were there when I betrayed him.”

“No, I meant why were you asking him to come back if you betrayed him?”

The answer was simple— because Uncle had been the only person who was there for him for years and he was the only one Zuko was proud to call family— but it caught itself in his throat at hearing Sokka call it a betrayal. He knew that that was exactly what it was, he’d said it himself, but it only affirmed the fact that he betrayed the only person who’d shown him unconditional kindness after his mother disappeared.

“Sorry, personal question,” Sokka said when Zuko didn’t respond. “I guess I’ll go back to sleep then.”

Zuko wanted to tell him to stay, wanted to ask him not to leave him alone with his thoughts, but that was far too straightforward so he did the next best thing. “My uncle was the only person who was there for me when I was banished.”

Sokka stopped before he even took two steps. “What about your crew? You didn’t have any, like, evil friends or whatnot on your ship?”

“No,” he sighed, though he almost wanted to chuckle at that. “I didn’t have anyone but him. I lost everything when I was banished.” He swallowed. “He kept me going. Even when I wasn’t sure I could anymore.”

“Oh.” He hesitantly walked back to his original spot in front of Zuko’s cell. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault, it’s mine,” he said. “I just wish I could tell him I’m sorry and prove to him that I’m better now.”

“I’m sure he’d be proud of you.”

He let a small smile show on his face. “You think so?”

“Yeah. I mean, you’re not trying to capture or kill anyone anymore and you’re even with us now. I think that proves you’ve gotten better and realized you were wrong.” He could almost hear a smile in Sokka’s voice. “He’d be pretty proud of you for that.”

“I hope so.”

“I hope you get a chance to fix things with him.”

He gave a small nod of appreciation. “Thank you.”

“Anytime.” It was at that point that the brief closeness of the moment fell away and Sokka awkwardly cleared his throat. “Well— uh, I guess I’d better go back to bed.”

“Oh. Yeah. You should probably get some sleep.”

“You too.” He took a step away. “See you in the morning?”

“Yeah,” he said. “See you in the morning.”


	3. Useless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is just the scene where zuko realizes he lost his firebending while he's teaching aang, only i made him more stressed out about it bc in this au, they only let him into the group for his firebending and now he doesnt have his firebending and it is a Predicament. once again, the development happens a bit fast, but hopefully y'all like it anyway lmao
> 
> also, happy valentines day! my aroace ass doesnt really celebrate today but if you do, have fun with your valentine!

It was gone.

His firebending was gone.

No matter how hard he tried to shoot a flame, all that came out was a pathetic burst of sparks the size of a campfire.

“No, no, no, come on!” he shouted, trying desperately to channel all of his chi into his next move as he stepped forward, but it was no use. He couldn’t seem to get past even two feet of fire.

“What’s wrong?” Aang asked from where he sat nearby.

“I don’t know!” Zuko huffed between katas. It didn’t seem that trying different forms made any real difference in the results he got but he had to try. His firebending was the only reason they were letting him stay and if he didn’t have his firebending, then… he had nothing. “I just— it’s not working! I can’t firebend.”

“What?” Aang stood up and approached him. “Why not?”

“I just said I don’t know!” He threw down his fists in frustration and groaned but immediately regretted lashing out when he remembered he was already on thin ice. They were nice enough to trust him not to try anything with the handcuffs off while he taught Aang and he couldn’t betray that trust. But once they found out he was useless to them… he doubted yelling at Aang would help with the consequences. “I’m sorry.” He sighed. “I’m going back to my cell.”

He didn’t give him time to stop him before he headed back past Toph, though he didn’t offer her an explanation when she made a remark about his weird behavior to prompt one as he wordlessly slumped into his cell and buried his face in his hands.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What was he going to do? He had to tell them. If he didn’t, Aang would, and then things would be so much worse when they found out he’d selfishly kept the truth from them to save his own ass.

But what would they do when he told them? Their only reason to keep him around was to teach Aang firebending and now, that reason was gone. They even said they’d ditch him once he taught him to firebend.

They were going to ditch him.

Agni, _damn it_.

He’d tried so hard. He’d behaved and dealt with the blindfold and let them keep him handcuffed and kept himself under control. He even got along with them now, almost like friends. He did everything right. He’d been _good_. If Zuko hadn’t betrayed him, Uncle might’ve even been proud of him.

The universe just hated him enough to take his firebending at the one time he needed it most.

Or maybe they wouldn’t ditch him. Maybe they’d just straight up kill him, finally take their revenge on him for everything he’s done. Maybe they’d get him tomorrow and make him regret ever being born. Like he didn’t already regret that.

But as much as he’d deserve it, he couldn’t see them doing that.

Part of him didn’t want to be kicked out because it meant he’d be completely alone again, but part of him also couldn’t deny he wanted to stay because of them. Because some part of him had genuinely enjoyed being a part of the group, even if he was still only their prisoner.

The first few days had been the roughest, but he’d been treated far better than he ever would’ve expected to be treated as a prisoner. He was never beaten or starved or hurt at all and at times, he almost could’ve mistaken himself as a friend of theirs.

Sokka joked with him and made him feel less alone, sometimes when he needed it. Toph vouched for him and made sure he was never truly mistreated. Aang treated him just like any of his other friends and made him feel welcomed and accepted into the group, although he still wasn’t officially a part of it. Even Katara warmed up to him a little when he was finally allowed to go without the blindfold at night and proved he wouldn’t betray her trust, letting him keep his handcuffs off in his cell and during meals even though she had every reason to believe it’d put them in danger. Just being allowed to actually firebend this time after days of only teaching Aang the katas was a miracle and he was more grateful for their trust than he’d ever know how to show.

Staying with them had given him the most comfort he’d had in just about his entire life.

Of course, he’d always been afraid of getting in trouble and ruining everything for himself, but his fears were just about always unfounded and more often than not, his mistakes were just laughed off and forgotten about. Aside from the blindfold, which didn’t even really count, he’d never been punished— even when he deserved it.

He had people in his life he could almost call friends who didn’t hold every mistake he made against him, who instead helped him and reassured him and never stopped being patient with him, even when he made mistakes big enough to fear that they’d finally get tired of him. Aang always helped him and Toph always understood and Sokka always cheered him up.

For the first time in a long time, smiling wasn’t a rare thing for him anymore, even though he was still technically a prisoner. Despite his cell, he no longer truly felt like one.

He’d finally found the right path and he didn’t want to lose sight of it again.

He didn’t want to lose them.

Maybe he’d get lucky and they wouldn’t leave or kill him. Maybe they’d understand and try to help him get his firebending back and let him stay.

All he wanted was to stay.

He knew they had no reason to keep him and this wasn’t some small mistake they could fix just like that, but if he couldn’t have his firebending, he just wanted to have them. If he had to get down on his knees and beg them to let him stay… damn it, he’d do it.

They were all he had.

Morning became afternoon became night and when they lit the campfire and started cooking, he knew he had run out of time. Once they invited him over, he was done for. He wanted to try firebending again in his cell, make one last attempt at forcing it back, but it was a bad idea to look like he was trying to break out and a request for permission to firebend would not only sound immediately suspicious but also probably be declined.

A doorway formed in the bars of the cell, a silent invitation to go join the rest of them.

He was out of time.

He took a deep breath and stepped out, forcing his legs in the direction of the campfire, anxiety hammering in his chest as he got closer and closer. It seemed his firebending had been replaced with waterbending because his palms were slick with sweat and it wasn’t because of the fire.

“What’s up with you?” Toph asked him as she took a bowl of soup from Katara. “Are you okay?”

Shit. He forgot she could feel him. Now they were all looking at him, confused, expecting an answer.

“I, um…” He sucked in air through his teeth, then sighed. He couldn’t lie to them. “No.”

He sat down miserably between Toph and Sokka, avoiding eye contact and trying to ignore everyone’s concerned looks.

“‘No’? That’s all you’re gonna say?” Sokka asked. “Come on, what’s wrong?”

Across from him, Aang gave him a reassuring nod and he swallowed his anxiety. “I…” He paused, trying desperately to delay the inevitable, but he had to say it sooner or later. “I lost my firebending.”

“You _what?_ ” Katara said, shocked, almost spilling soup on Aang as she passed him his bowl, and Zuko’s heart sank. “Ugh, of course you lost it at the worst time possible.”

“Oh, no. Who’s going to teach Aang firebending now?” Sokka groaned, throwing his hands up and falling back onto the ground. Disappointment suffocated whatever hope he might’ve had left. They already wanted to replace him.

“How did you _lose_ your firebending?” Toph asked. “I didn’t know that was even possible.”

“Well, it’s not totally gone, it’s just… weaker, somehow. I don’t know why,” he sighed. “I’m sorry. I know you only kept me around for my firebending, but I… I really enjoy being with you guys.” He could see and feel their confusion, probably wondering why he was even trying to convince them to let him stay when he wasn’t useful to them anymore. “So… what I’m trying to ask is, please don’t kick me out.”

“What?” all four of them chorused at the same time. This did not feel like a good sign.

“Look, I— I’ll beg if you want me to, I know I’m useless to you now and you don’t have any reason to keep me around, but I just— I really want to stay and I’m sorry I lost my firebending, just, please—“

“Zuko, we’re not kicking you out.”

His desperate stammering was cut off by Aang’s statement and now it was his turn to be confused. “What?”

“Why would we kick you out? You’re practically one of us now,” Sokka said, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and pulling him over. He wanted to be annoyed, but he was too surprised to be considered one of them and too confused at hearing that they wouldn’t be kicking him out.

“But you— you said on my first day here that you’d ditch me after I taught Aang to firebend and now I can’t and I thought—“

“I was _kidding_ ,” Sokka scoffed, letting him go to take his bowl from Katara.

“You were?” Toph said. Zuko’s heart dropped at that— if the rest of them had been serious, they might still kick him out— but she seemed to notice. “Relax, Fireflake. It’s called a joke. You should make one sometime.”

“But… why are you still keeping me around? I’m useless to you now. I-I’d just be a— a liability,” he mumbled, his head hung in shame.

“So what if you are? Come on, you really think we only want you here for your firebending?” Sokka asked.

Zuko looked at him. “...Why else would you want me here?”

“Uh, because you’re a cool dude?” he offered. “I mean, I can’t bend at all, but they still like me! Right, guys?”

He looked to the rest of them, who all stared at him silently except Aang who beamed innocently at him, and his humorous smile dropped in exasperation.

“Thanks, Aang. Anyway, my point is, Zuko”—he set his bowl down and put his arm back around Zuko, gesticulating as he spoke—“you’re worth more to us than just your firebending. I don’t know how they do it in the Fire Nation, but we don’t just throw away people when they’re not useful anymore.” He let him go to pick up his bowl with one hand and put the other on his shoulder. “Besides, you’re actually a pretty cool dude when you’re… you know, not trying to capture or murder any of us.”

“But I’m not… ‘cool’,” Zuko said, a tinge of sadness in his voice. “Not like the rest of you. I’m a bad person. The only thing I could offer you guys was my firebending, and now that’s gone and… well, I don’t have anything else to give you.” He sighed and dropped his gaze. “I’m really sorry.”

“Yeah. You were a bad person and you should be sorry.”

Katara’s voice surprised all of them as they realized she’d barely spoken at all and any hope he might’ve had left fell apart under her hard haze.

“Katara—“

She cut Aang off. “But you’re not anymore.” She ladled soup into an empty bowl so casually he almost questioned if she actually cared. “At least, I hope not. I never really know with you.” He remembered betraying them— betraying Uncle— and he cringed at the memory. It wasn’t one of his favorite. “Honestly, I’d be more than happy to just leave you in the middle of the desert or something.”

“I don’t blame you,” he replied softly, unsure where she was going with this while everyone else listened with concerned expressions. “I’d deserve it.”

“But I think you also deserve a second chance.”

He hesitantly looked up at her, wondering where her sudden change of heart came from, but her face gave nothing away.

“Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t like you and it’ll take a lot more than a pity party to make me, but if everyone else does, then I guess my veto doesn’t really count for much.” She looked around at all of them but Zuko. “I trust you guys, so if you trust him and want him to stay, then so do I.”

She exchanged smiles with each of them, going around the circle until she reached Zuko.

“Thank you,” he said, offering her a small, grateful smile, though she didn’t return it. “I won’t let you down. I swear.” He even had Katara’s approval to stay now and he couldn’t have been more grateful. They actually wanted him to stay, even if he was useless to them. They really cared about him.

But… that didn’t change the fact that he was still useless.

“All I want is to stay and I’m grateful to be allowed to, I really am, but I still don’t have anything to give you but myself,” he said to them. “I still want to help. I just don’t know how.”

“Maybe I do,” Toph said. “I might know a way to get your firebending back.”

“You do?”

She nodded. “You should try going to the original source of firebending.” She paused to drink her soup. “For earthbending, that’s badgermoles. That’s how I learned to earthbend.”

“I learned from the monks, but the original airbenders were sky bison.” Aang looked out at Appa with a playful smile. “Maybe you can give me a lesson sometime, buddy!”

Appa roared in response.

“Okay, but the original firebenders were dragons, and they’ve all been dead for a long time,” Zuko groaned.

“Not that long. They were still around before I ended up in an iceberg.”

“Well, they’re not around anymore,” he huffed. It seemed hopeless. Even with their approval to stay, even though he was lucky enough for them to like him despite everything he’d done, it still wasn’t good enough. He had to prove that he was worth their kindness, but how?

“What about people who learned from the original source?” Aang suggested. “Like how I learned from the monks.”

People who learned from the original source… he almost wanted to laugh at how his Fire Nation history lessons were finally being put to use. “There are the ancient Sun Warriors, but they’re even more dead than the monks are.” He saw Aang’s smile falter and he internally cursed himself for his stupid joke. “Sorry, sorry. I just meant they’ve been gone for hundreds of years.”

He paused, trying to recount as much information on them as he could. In his head, he pictured a world map and marked down the locations of as many Sun Warrior civilizations as he could remember. If only he had Azula’s memory.

“There’s actually an old Sun Warrior civilization not too far from here,” he said, his face lighting up with hope for a moment. “Maybe if I go there, I’ll learn something about the original firebenders.”

“Awesome, let’s go!” Aang jumped to his feet, but Katara grabbed him and pulled him back down.

“Oh, no, you don’t. Not tonight. You need to eat and get some sleep first,” she said firmly.

“Oh, yeah, right. Okay.” He picked up his bowl and tipped its contents into his mouth.

“That means you too,” Katara said to Zuko, handing him a bowl.

He smiled and gladly accepted it. “Thanks.”

When they finished eating, she put out the fire and Zuko stood, starting back toward his cell when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Wait,” Aang said behind him, and he turned around. “Uh… do you want to sleep with us tonight?”

“What?” He glanced at the others nervously. “I don’t know, they might not want me here—“

“I think tonight’s proved that they do,” he said. “Come on. They won’t mind. You can sleep on Appa with us if you want. He’s a lot warmer than the ground is.”

Zuko hesitantly looked back at his cell, then at where everyone else was setting up for bed with Appa. As unsure as he felt, he couldn’t deny his cell was lonely and cold and sleeping on a giant furry animal with them did sound nice. He hadn’t comfortably slept near anyone who wasn’t Uncle in… well, ever. He’d never trusted anyone like he trusted Uncle.

He tried not to think about how he betrayed Uncle’s trust in him.

He nodded. “Okay.” There was a first time for everything. He was just grateful not to be handcuffed.

“Great, come on!”

He let Aang lead him to an empty spot on the far side of Appa’s fur beside Toph and, to his surprise, none of them even batted an eye. He caught Katara shooting Aang a disapproving look, but it didn’t seem to bother him as he left Zuko to find his own spot.

Zuko went to lie down but barely got one foot on Appa’s fur when Toph jumped.

“Holy— jeez, Zuko, you scared the life out of me!” she complained. “Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

He froze in place at her outburst. “Sorry.” Slowing his movements just a little to seem more predictable, he sat down.

“Eh, it’s okay. Appa’s fur just makes everything look more… well, furry,” she said as she sat down too. “I’d sleep on the ground, but it’s too cold.”

“You get used to it after the first few nights,” he responded with a shrug.

She leaned back against Appa, hands under her head and feet extended out just past his fur and onto the ground. “Oh— yeah. Sorry we made you sleep on the ground.”

“It’s okay. I get why. I’m just glad I’m allowed to sleep here now, even if it’s only for the night.” He laid down on Appa’s soft coat of fur and rolled onto his right side, his scarred left ear smothering the sound of the world just a little. “Goodnight, Toph.”

He heard a muffled voice respond. “Night, Fireflake.”


	4. Extinguished

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the late update, i was busy today and didn't have any time to post. but!! it's here now and also the longest chapter yet, so hopefully the length makes up for my lateness :)) i'm not great at writing action but i hope this suffices!

“I can’t believe you!”

Katara’s furious voice cut through the thunder outside, a harsh contrast to Zuko’s as he tried to approach her from behind, reaching out for her shoulder. “Katara, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean—“

“I don’t care!” she yelled, turning and glaring at him, her eyes piercing through him as his hand fell to his side and he froze, afraid of the consequences of taking another step.

“Katara, please, I’m—“

“You know what? Get out.”

His heart dropped. “What?”

“You heard me.” She reached for her bottle of water. “Get. Out.”

No. No, he couldn’t leave, he couldn’t be kicked out, he’d been doing so well and he’d been so sure they really liked him and he was so close to finally being considered a part of the group, finally having people to consider his friends.

He was so close, and he just lost all of his progress to two words from Katara’s mouth.

She had no right.

Disappointment and sadness faded as rage began bubbling over, a fire he hadn’t felt in weeks igniting in him.

“Jeez, keep it down! I’m trying to sleep!” Toph shouted from where she laid on Appa.

“What’s going on?” Sokka sat up and rubbed his eyes, looking over at where Zuko and Katara stood. “Guys?”

“I’m kicking Zuko out,” she said simply.

He paused to let her words sink in, then realized what she said. “Wait, what? Since when?”

“You’re what?” Toph asked, sitting up and making her way to the ground.

“Since now!” Katara scowled, ignoring Toph. Turning back to Zuko, she took the cork out of her water bottle and water floated out, a silent threat.

“Hey, hang on, shouldn’t this be a group decision—“

“Sokka, stay out of this!” she warned, eyes trained on Zuko. “Either you leave on your own or I make you.”

No.

She had no  _ right _ .

He’d tried so hard to be allowed to stay, even after they told him they wouldn’t leave him. She had no idea how hard it was to truly prove he was worth their time and their friendship, how terrifying it’d been to completely surrender himself to the people that had hated him from the start and wake up every morning wondering if that day would be the day they took their revenge on him or left him behind. She had no idea just how terrifying the thought of losing them had been to him.

She had no idea how alone he truly was.

The fire growing inside of him fought to be released, eager to unleash its wrath on Katara because she had  _ no fucking right _ to do this to him. He could fight. He could just end things with them because if they didn’t want him, then he didn’t want them either. He didn’t need them. He didn’t need anyone.

He stepped forward into a perfect firebending form and he had just enough time to light a fire in his palm when a wall shot up between them.

“Are you guys done yet?” Toph asked, sounding almost bored as she yawned. “Man, I’m trying to sleep and the rain’s loud enough.”

“Toph, I swear, if you don’t put down this—“

“Yeah, we’re done,” Zuko said, letting his flame go out before he could let himself think about why. “I’m leaving.”

Toph dropped a hand and the wall sank back into the ground. “What?”

“Zuko, you don’t have to go—“ Sokka jumped to his feet and started toward him but faltered at a glare from Katara.

“No, it’s fine. She wants me to go, so I’ll go,” he said, venom tainting his tone.

“And good riddance,” she said as she crossed her arms.

With one last glance at them, he turned his back on the people he once thought could be his friends and stormed out into the rain.

It felt like hours before he’d walked all the anger out of his system and collapsed in a small clearing wet from the rain, dragging himself up against a tree under an umbrella of leaves before finally allowing himself to break down.

He’d really messed up this time.

Pissing off Katara and not immediately dropping to his knees to beg for forgiveness like an Agni-damned Fire Nation servant was his first mistake.

The second was putting out his flame and leaving.

Why did he let her win?

He had every opportunity to defy her. He could’ve broken through Toph’s wall and fought her. He could’ve asked Toph or Sokka for help because they both seemed to want him to stay. He could’ve woken up Aang and asked him for help.

Why did he forfeit instead?

No, that was a stupid question. He knew why.

Because he was weak.

He was weak and stupid and dishonorable.

He was a disgrace.

A sob fought its way up his throat and he put no effort into trying to choke it back down as he let his tears run down his face, hugging his knees to his chest to try and stop the shaking.

His only shot at being a part of Aang’s group was gone now.

All of his progress with getting the blindfold and handcuffs off and being allowed out of his cell, all of the good memories he’d made and the relationships he’d built with them.

Gone.

And knowing him, it was probably all his fault.

He wanted to believe it was Katara’s, but she was a better person than he’d ever be and he was just stupid, letting his pride get in the way. He should’ve just listened to her and realized he was wrong.

He’d lost his family and his uncle and now the only people he’d ever truly wanted to consider his friends.

Even after they told him they wanted him to stay, even though he stayed on his best behavior anyway, he still failed.

Now, he had nothing.

He was nothing.

He could only cry pathetically in the woods, moonlight reflecting off the tears staining his face, the brisk night air burning his throat with every shaky breath. Freezing and wet and more alone than he’d ever been.

“Damn it!”

He swept his arm out in a fit of rage, fire shooting out his hand and catching on a damp tree across from him, and then buried his face in his arms, sobs wracking his body as he listened to the fire crackle and die in the rain.

Water always beat fire.

“Damn it.”

He paused to let the last of his tears soak into his sleeves, then took a deep breath. He was on his own now and he had to keep a level head. Nobody was going to help him if he couldn’t get himself together and figure out how to survive.

First issue was shelter. The tree he was sitting against wouldn’t protect him from the wind or the cold. After that, he needed sleep. He’d already had dinner with the group, so he could worry about food tomorrow.

He sighed and swallowed his complaints, then stood and ventured out into the rain.

It took what he guessed was around two hours to set up a crude shelter. The first hour was spent trying to find dry sticks or leaves or just anything that wasn’t soaking wet; the second was spent trying to dry wet wood and leaves with whatever fire he was able to keep burning in what little shelter the leaves above him offered. Finally, he’d just given up and built a lean-to with the damp wood and covered it with layers of wet leaves, hoping they’d serve as good insulation.

He hadn’t once stopped shivering and with no way to keep a fire lit and nothing to keep warm with on the ground, it didn’t seem like he would. He could only try to focus on breathing and regulating his body temperature with his firebending in a futile attempt not to catch a cold. At least the leaves blocked the wind and he’d set out more to catch the rain.

But he couldn’t control his body temperature forever. He had to relax to sleep.

He laid down and took his focus away from his breathing, trying to ignore the cold seeping into his skin through his wet clothes which only kept it in. He had to think about something else. Think about something good, like… like how he’d have clean water tomorrow. Once everything dried up, he could use leaves as a blanket and it’d be warmer than sleeping on the stone ground at the temple.

It took a lot of shivering and tossing and turning to try and find a position that let him stay the warmest, but he finally managed to fall asleep.

He woke up to a rustling noise somewhere nearby and sat up, looking out into the darkness and searching for whoever was concealed in it.

“Who’s there?” he called, readying himself for a battle he didn’t want to fight. He threw fire in the direction of the noise he’d heard, hoping he could just scare off whoever was there despite the rain. “Stay back!”

“It’s me!”

Toph?

She came for him?

He realized he’d messed up when he heard her voice, but it wasn’t until her scream broke through his weariness that the reality of the situation sank in and he realized the rain hadn’t put out his fire in time.

“Wait, no, I’m sorry!” He stumbled onto his feet, but she was already crawling backward away from him.

“You burned my feet!” she yelled, scrambling away in the dark.

“Wait! Please, I’m sorry!” he cried. He chased her desperately, barely able to keep up in the dark. “I’m sorry! Let me help you!”

“Get away from me!”

A chunk of earth shot up from beneath him, sending him flying and he landed hard, dull pain shooting through his back. Searching his surroundings, he found her again in the darkness just before she disappeared back into it.

“Ugh!” he groaned, letting his head fall back onto the ground as rain fell on him. “Why am I so bad at being good?”

He was lucky enough to get a second chance and stupid enough to mess that up too.

Damn it.

He’d never even expected any of them to come for him anyway, but Toph did, and how did he repay her? By attacking her.

He was so  _ stupid _ .

“I think it was this way!”

A voice that wasn’t his interrupted his thoughts and for a split second, he thought it was Toph, before realizing it was a male voice. He had just enough time to get to his feet before a man carrying a lantern emerged from the trees nearby.

“Found him!”

He took a step back as more people revealed themselves and quickly surrounded him. He glanced around at them; there were five of them and one of him. Maybe if they weren’t benders, he could take them on, even in the rain.

“I knew I saw a firebender somewhere around here,” the same person said. “Where’s the girl you attacked?”

“...She got away,” he responded, hesitating slightly. “And I wasn’t attacking her.”

A woman scoffed. “Then what were you doing?”

“I was—“ He paused, then scowled and swept his arm out in front of him threateningly. “Nevermind what I was doing! Get away from me!” Fire came to life in his palm, but it was extinguished by the rain just as quickly and his face fell. He was at a severe disadvantage in the rain and he wasn’t so sure he could overcome it.

The man took a step toward Zuko and laughed. “I don’t think so.” Then he looked to the rest of his group. “Let’s search his shelter. He’s gotta have something good. Nuying, watch him.” The woman, Nuying, nodded.

“I don’t have anything,” Zuko said, crossing his arms as he watched four of them head for his lean-to.

“Sure you don’t, Prince Zuko,” Nuying scoffed.

His heart dropped. They knew who he was— no wonder they were so hostile toward him. “How do you know who I am?”

“How could I not?” she said with a snort. “News of a banished Fire Nation prince spreads like a wildfire.” She chuckled. “Get it? Wildfire?”

“Hold on,  _ that’s _ Prince Zuko?” another guy in the group asked, turning around to face Nuying, then looking back at the man from before. “Guang, we’re holding up the  _ prince _ ?”

“Yeah, which means he’s gotta have something,” Guang said, reaching the shelter. He crouched down and held the lantern out, only to find nothing but barren ground. “Where are you hiding your things?”

“I told you, I don’t have anything—“

He was cut off by Guang giving his lean-to a swift kick, knocking the whole thing down and sending sticks falling onto the ground.

“Hey! What’d you do that for?!” he shouted, stepping forward angrily.

“I know you’ve got something, and you’re gonna give it to me,” Guang said. “I’m more than willing to hurt Fire Nation royalty.”

“But I don’t—“

The ground shifted beneath him and reached up to encase his entire lower body, trapping him.

“Let me go! I don’t have anything to give you!” he yelled, pulling against the solid rock.

“I said,” Guang repeated, “I know you’ve got something, and you’re gonna give it to me.”

Zuko felt a fire sparking inside of him and his first instinct was to smother it— it was useless in the rain— when he realized the lower half of his body was protected from the weather. Suppressing a smile, he concentrated the heat in his body into his hands, and then—

Chunks of rock flew outward, flying into Nuying and one of the unnamed men. Flames burst from where Zuko stood, freeing him, and he ran the moment his legs were free, sending a wave of fire behind him.

He heard Guang’s voice behind him. “Nuying!”

It wasn’t until daggers of ice formed in the rain and shot toward him that he realized the shout wasn’t out of concern.

He went to jump out of the way, but he smashed into a wall that wasn’t there before and ice tore through his arm and leg accompanied by a sharp, frigid pain. He cried out and clutched his arm, blood coating his palm, determined to push forward until a large ball of water crashed into him and knocked him back into yet another wall. Stumbling onto his feet, just barely able to keep his balance, he made it almost one more step on his good leg before a boulder flew into him from behind, knocking the wind out of him and shoving him face-first into the ground where the rain froze around him and trapped him in an icy prison.

He heard them approach behind him and he braced himself for worse when Guang’s feet appeared beside him. “Tsk. Firebenders never know when to just give up.”

“Let me g—“

A band of ice wrapped around his head and froze the inside of his mouth, silencing him instantly, and he inhaled sharply at how cold it was. Trying to brute force it off with only his jaw didn’t work; it was too solid.

“Let’s just leave him here,” Nuying said, walking around to his other side. The ice shifted around him and he found himself standing upright, forced to look her in the eye and mask his fear, blinking rain out of his eyes. “Sooner or later he’ll either pass out from the cold or die. Maybe both.” With a wave of her hand, he flew backward into a tree and the ice froze around it, his gasp reduced to a pathetic yelp by the gag.

“Sounds good to me.” Guang gestured to the rest of them and together, they headed back where they came from, leaving him to die as he fought back tears.

Zuko tried to yell, scream at them for attacking him and demand that they get him out, but the gag was barely melting at all and he was losing body heat too quickly to melt it faster. He was shivering hard, but it did nothing to help him stay warm when every bit of warmth his body tried to generate was outmatched by ten times as much cold. Without heat, he couldn’t firebend his way out. Even if he had heat, it’d only melt the ice enough to extinguish any fire he tried to conjure. It was useless to even try.

Part of him wanted to wonder if getting out was even worth it. He didn’t have anyone to go back to. He didn’t have anywhere to go. He could just succumb to his injuries and the cold and be put out of his misery. Nobody would care anyway. He was just more Fire Nation scum; he’d be doing the world a favor.

But some part of him refused. He may have lost everything else, but he hadn’t lost his drive. His fire. And it refused to die. Not here. Not like this. And absolutely not at the hands of people like them.

He took a deep breath to calm himself and tried pulling at the ice, but there was no give. Numbness had already taken over his mouth and had just begun to spread through his body but as much as it was a bad sign, it quelled the pain in his arm and leg just enough to be able to mentally push it aside.

All he could do was try his best to focus on his breathing, remember how Uncle taught him to breathe to stay warm, remember to focus. Don’t think about how he betrayed him. Don’t remember how he might not get a chance to apologize, even if he did survive this. Shaky breath after shaky breath, he couldn’t let himself stop, even to cry. He was running out of time and he could only do what little he could to survive at least until dawn.

He passed out the moment the sun began to peek above the horizon, too exhausted and cold to wonder if he’d wake up again.

If it wasn’t for pain ripping through his arm and leg and his head smashing into the ground as he fell out, he wasn’t sure he would’ve.

He hissed in pain as his neck ached from the fall and went to pick himself up, only to realize he no longer had any feeling left in the rest of his body and his mouth was just about completely frozen.

Shit.

His arms moved, but the injured one buzzed with a dull yet harsh pain and shook badly. Dried blood wrapped around his arm like a second skin with tears where fresh blood was leaking out and judging by the holes it was coming from, the pain that woke him up had been from frozen blood that had been ripped out when he fell. His other arm also shook under pressure, weak from the ice, but he managed to force his body to sit up before it gave out.

The moment he moved his head, the world seemed to topple and spin, his vision blurry and unfocused. He had to put down his good arm to stabilize himself before he leaned too far and fell. When he trusted his body enough not to fall, he took his hand off the ground and grabbed the melting gag with it, ripping it off his face and spitting shards of ice out of his numb mouth. His legs were next to be forced to move, but they were still frozen in the half-bent position they’d been in in the ice and his hurt leg was bleeding just as much as his arm.

Still shivering from the cold that had yet to wear off, he dragged himself back to the tree with one arm and sat up against its trunk, breathing heavily as he tried to control the pain in his limbs. It was morning now and the rain had stopped, so he was slowly regenerating his body heat. Concentrating on that, he focused the warmth into his legs and slowly but surely, they softened. Careful not to strain his bad leg, he straightened out the good one and bent it, making sure it could move well enough to walk and shattering the last of the ice.

He sighed.

Now to actually walk.

He grabbed onto a foothold on the tree and pulled his leg inward. Then, using the foothold as leverage, he managed to pull it underneath him and extend it, standing up.

Only for it to wobble and give out from under him, sending him falling back on the ground with a strained yell.

Damn it.

Round two.

Holding onto the same foothold, he repeated the same steps, this time slower, giving his leg time to steady. His damp clothes only weighed him down, but he couldn’t let that stop him. Focusing heat into that leg, it trembled and then straightened, successfully holding him up.

He let a weak smile show on his face. “Yes!” The word felt stiff in his thawing mouth, but he didn’t care.

That was the first good thing to happen since yesterday.

His injured leg came next, but even now that he could warm it, it still wasn’t strong enough to walk on. The heat only made it worse. He felt the feeling in his leg return but relief was crushed by a burning pain, matching its bloody appearance. His other leg threatened to drop him, but he fought the pain through gritted teeth. It was just a feeling. Pain was just a feeling. He would get through it. He would walk whether his body wanted to or not.

But walk where?

He racked his brain, trying to think of somewhere, anywhere he could go that wasn’t the Western air temple, but there was nothing.

He had to go back and he had to go back now.

Seeing no other choice, he braced himself and stuck his injured leg out, shifting his weight onto it for barely half a second of agony before returning to his other leg. He could walk. Not easily, not comfortably, but he could  _ walk _ .

And he’d spent who-knows-how-long walking away last night.

Fuck.

He had no idea how far he was from the temple. He had no idea where the temple even  _ was _ , and he had to make it back on  _ foot _ .

Was it even possible to make it back before he collapsed and died?

The answer was, more likely than not, no.

But he had to try.

Every step he took sent fresh pain burning anew through his leg and every second that passed tired out his working leg and every time he tried to collect his thoughts, they all seemed to just run away from him like the pain and exhaustion towered behind him. Blood trailed behind him and splotchy red footprints marked his path, a sight that would’ve horrified him if he could think straight, and the dizziness and disorientation that nearly threw him off-balance too many times to count were almost enough to make him give up.

Almost.

But he had a million semi-comprehensive apologies and pleads waiting on his tongue and he was entirely willing to throw himself at Katara’s feet if it meant they’d take pity on him and keep him alive. He hated pity, hated having to settle for so little, but desperation was all that was keeping him going and he clung to it because his life depended on it. He knew he’d made huge mistakes last night, mistakes he might never be forgiven for because of his ignorance, but it didn’t matter. He didn’t need their friendship or their acceptance or their trust— he needed their mercy.

Agni, please, show him mercy.

Stumbling into the temple grounds, clutching his arm with a bloody hand and just barely still able to stay upright, he forced words out of his mouth at the horrified hazy faces staring at him.

“I’m s— please, I didn’t… I-I… didn’t know where else to…”

He was falling to the ground before he could get out his last word, his leg finally too worn to stand as hazy figures and distorted voices clouded his thoughts.

“...go.”

Pain and exhaustion pulled him into darkness and he could no longer find the energy to fight back.

He opened his eyes to see Guang and Nuying in the darkness and he barely made it two steps before his leg gave out, sending him crashing to the ground.

He raised his head, looking up at them with undeniable fear in his eyes. “You— you’re back— but—“ His voice wavered and he winced at the pain in his limbs. “Why?”

“Why do you think?” Nuying said with a scoff. “We couldn’t resist coming back for more.”

“No, I mean—” He propped himself up on his good arm and the pain from throwing out his other arm fueled his words— “why can’t you just leave me  _ alone _ ?!”

A weak fire burst from his hand and immediate regret flooded over him when chunks of rock threw him back, plastering him to a tree he hadn’t even seen. Only his injured limbs were left exposed with his wrist and ankle restrained and he watched as Nuying conjured up water and it floated toward him, the suspense and helplessness destroying any pride he had left.

“Wait— wait, no, please—” He fought his restraints, tried desperately to break out, but they were completely immovable. “Please, I don’t want to— I don’t want to die—”

“Zuko, calm down,” Guang said, his voice so reassuring he had to be taunting him, there had to be something terrible coming.

Heart pounding with fear and palms slick with sweat, too desperate to think, he summoned the last of his fire and it exploded out his hand, melting away the darkness— but not his restraints.

His eyes shot open to screams and to his horror, the water had already reached his arm.

“No— no, no, no, wait— please, I’m sorry—”

“Zuko, calm down!”

Sokka’s voice broke through, and Zuko’s eyes darted over to find him and Katara backed a few feet away from him. “But— Guang and Nuying—”

“Who and what now?” he asked, crossing his arms. “Just calm down and let Katara heal you before she changes her mind.”

“You’re lucky she even decided to help at all,” Toph said, standing on his other side with Aang. “You were thrashing and fighting like crazy. I had to bend the ground around you to keep you still enough for her to do her waterbending magic.”

He took another look down his body and sure enough, he was restrained like he was in his nightmare. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I just— I thought—” He opened his mouth to explain, then sighed. “Nevermind.” They didn’t need to hear his weird nightmare. They’d already seen the aftermath of what had happened to him. “Um, can you please—”

Toph waved a hand and his restraints sank back into the stone platform he laid on, a silent answer to his meek request.

“Thank you.”

A glow near his arm caught his attention and he looked over to find the water wrapping back around his arm, followed by a soothing feeling as the pain dissipated slowly. He exhaled softly with relief, almost forgetting about his leg.

Despite healing him, Katara’s expression was sour and he thought back to what he did to upset her the previous night. He had to apologize. They were taking the time and effort to help him despite everything he’d done and he hadn’t even apologized for it yet.

He swallowed his pride. “Katara—”

“Zuko—”

They spoke and stopped at the same time, only thickening the tension.

“You go ahead,” he offered.

She nodded, then sighed. “I’m sorry for kicking you out last night. It was wrong of me to make a decision like that on my own and I shouldn’t have done that to you in the heat of the moment.”

He stared at her. He’d expected a lot of things— to be berated, thrown back out, maybe even yelled at for daring to come back— but none of them had been this. “What?”

“It’s my fault this happened to you, Zuko, and I’m sorry,” she said, her sour look replaced by a solemn one. She paused, presumably to think about her next words as his arm healed and she moved onto his leg. “I was just… angry and hurt and irrational, and you didn’t deserve any of it. I just hope you can forgive me.”

“...You’re asking  _ me _ to forgive you?” He almost sat up out of surprise. “But I— you— you were so angry last night I thought I was never going to be allowed back because I messed up so bad. I didn’t listen to you at first when you told me to leave and I firebent without permission and I almost fought you because I was so upset and I thought— I was about to beg for  _ your _ forgiveness if that was what it took—”

“Zuko, you have nothing to be sorry about,” Aang interrupted, stepping forward. “Katara told us everything and you did nothing wrong. You were just upset that she went that far and you had every right to be. You’re allowed to be angry too.”

“But… I’m always angry for the wrong reasons and you guys always have good reasons to be upset so I just— I thought I overreacted like I always do.”

“You? Overreact?” Toph scoffed. “Please. You’re the tamest firebender I’ve ever met. You say sorry, like, every ten seconds.”

Aang cracked a smile at that. “Yeah, you really do. You’re a lot more considerate and self-aware than you used to be. You should give yourself credit for that.”

“Sorry, I just—” It took him a moment to realize and cut himself off. “I mean— I just… don’t have much experience with handling my emotions properly. I used to let them control me and my anger fueled me, but now I don’t want to live like that anymore and… I guess I just don’t really trust myself because of it.”

“Well, if you need help, you’ve got us,” Sokka said with a confident smile, which quickly turned into a humorously egotistical one. “I for one am very skilled at managing my emotions. You have no idea how often Katara gets on my nerves because I just let it go like water off a turtleduck’s back.” A hand gesture accentuated his last sentence.

“What?” She glared at him.

“Kidding. I’m kidding,” he said, raising his hands in mock surrender, then looking back to Zuko. “What I’m trying to say is, if you need help figuring out your emotions or whatnot, we’re here. Right, guys?”

“Right,” the rest of them said in unison.

Zuko smiled. “Thanks.” Katara finished healing his leg and he sat up, allowing himself to hope just a little bit. “...Does this mean I’m back in the group?”

“Well, you were never really kicked out, so… yeah!” Aang beamed.

“Yes!” he exclaimed, then caught himself. “I mean— thank you. I promise I won’t let you down.”

“You don’t have to promise,” Aang said. “We already know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last completed chapter so far, but i do have more in the works! i'll post them whenever i finish them, but i've been fairly busy lately and haven't had much time to do anything so this is the end for now


End file.
